Independence, Liberty and Justice - they waiver daily in my world the only independence I have is my thoughts and emotions everything else is constrained by others. My body by my doctors, my physical being by the bank and money, my family (who actually are not very nice to me) don't care for me on any level (sad indication of todays world) and generally I'm under pressure from all sides to survive.
Why is this?
Has it always been this way? Are we going to be under 'a gun' always? What can we do to achieve fullfillment and independence. I am so sad about others who during their lifetimes will never even know the independence I have. I am able to stear my own ship but often because of circumstances it has to encounter waves and tsunamis of gigantioun proportions.
Today Americans around the world get to celebrate an amazing ideaology - freedom of speech, freedom of will, freedom of personal being and the freedom to achieve liberty and justice. What a heady cocktail. I celebrate with you and trust that the future will be more of good things and we can all move onto a better and free world. This is taking lives, effort beyong our imaginations and human sacrifices that are unable to be comprehended by most of us. Mr President I give you all my trust to take us from this evil and give us the strength of will to cope and live productive and successful lives. This is a biggy for any one individual to have on their coat tail and I wish you every success even the smallest most insignificant will help us all....thank you
Enough of the weeping Robyn,,,,,,,,,,it is a celebration after all. To my American friends have a great day (today here) and tomorrow our time in the U.S.A. have lots of potato salad, burgers, hot dogs, lemonade and banana cream pie for me ..... please you put on the weight and I'll enjoy the sensations. I know there is a party or two today and I wish I could be at every single one of them........lololololol Rock on a Southern Comfort and diet coke in my case just the Diet Coke but enjoy your freedoms and liberties and keep your goals and dreams for your futures.
Okay this should be fast from here, I've run out of cigarettes - thank you John for the packet last night (you know who you are xxxx) and I will be out scrounging for more after this blog is finished.
I am going to touch on networks - mine is really great considering the effort I have put in to achieve it, yesterday a friend of mine and I were talking about her network which has changed because of moving house. This is often the case if we change our areas and the places we know well out goes the network. Hers included the local dairy (for cigs, bread and cat food) when things were tough - there are a considerable percentage of us out there - those of you who breeze into the dairy throw down your cash and collect you goods and run quickly I envy you.......so many of us don't actually know where our next mouthfull of food is coming from. This is scary and unacceptable on so many levels but it is an actual fact!
I am in a negative with the bank as I had to ask for $20-00 overdraft for a couple of days and for this priviledge they charged me $70-00 so to pay the $10-00 company registration of a name and $10-00 registration of that name via my debit card over the internet has caused me heaps of grief. My benefit went in and all the automatic payments have gone out but lolololol no money for food. Now I work on the principal that it will come in (I think I might just be insane but I dont' care) the etheric and general universe hopefully will give me the opportunity to a. be creative b. find $100 buck note on the sidewalk c. tickle up a friend/network for cigs and cat food and don't laugh toilet paper. Another friend here in my close (townhouses) is as badly off as I am but she kindly gave me cat food last night and two bog roll....thanks 'J' by bum and cats thank you...hehehhehe
As usual my week has been up and down and aroundabout.....when do you think I will be able to rest? I also feel guilty about a friends project that I promised to talk about in here but I have been so tired and actually sad that I went to bed at 9 last night and woke up at 5 today, its now 8 a.m. and I still have a head and shoulders gnawing at me they feel like they have an elastic band tightening as I type...its not a good feeling I assure you - my Tongan friend has the same physical traits as I do we get so tired that we cannot actually keep our eyes open being a physical impossibility, your body tries to rest but we just won't let it. I sit and physically force my teeth together and wake up - if we eat we become so tired we are wobbly - this is abject tiredness and I know intimately how soldiers feel it is perverse and mind blowing how you can bring yourself out of being tired and into an awake mode. Adrenelin is the key but I'm waiting for the day when my friend and I both cark it....sleep standing up in the Supermarket not knowing where we are.........lolololol My friend and I work this hard simply because there isn't an alternative at this point. She does a Herald run so gets up at 3.30 a.m. and does that then comes home and feeds everyone their breakfast then takes her youngest to school (next week holidays yeee haaa) then comes home and sorts out the washing, cleaning and food then maybe gets a nap of say 2 hours and then up and about again....this is a six out of seven day process - nobody else can do it...this is for money to eat and pay the power and live.....why the F is it so hard? Is there not a break anywhere? Are we doing it to ourselves? NO we have circumstances beyond our control - YES O U R CONTROL....they are outside influences that dominate and dictate our lives - no independence not able to take off time for ourselves nor sleep nor be able to go shopping without a war effort....now I mean war as in sorting out how much money what food is requried (now we are talking only basics) no steak for us...lolololol DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR US other than these stupid idiotic outside influences we are actually relative happy. Its just our physical bodies need food and water and warmth and a roof over our heads....not a lot really and I do I admit transfer my thoughts to those who don't have any of these things so I feel better. We survive but at a very very low level. I'm not saying that those who have money should use it for others - that isn't what we want - we are working hard to achieve our own destinys and its just speed bumps along the way that keep us under their thumbs.....
We don't like hand outs - they make us feel shitty and unworthy - we do all between ourselves share what we have in a universal way - if I have shoes that a friend could use I give, if she has a top I might light she gives to me. etc. etc. etc. On the food front I always try and give actual food and they do the same for me.....its a green dollar exchange with no recriminations and noone feels (well I hope they don't) that we are being condesending of each other...........thank God we do have one another!!!!
CHANGING THE SUBJECT; have to .............lolololol
Now for something really special I know of a young man who has worked so hard to achieve a fantastic dream and goal. He took over the reigns from his father so this is another generation moving forward with an original dream.
There is a beautiful significant yacht just gone into the viaduct harbor here in Auckland it is 70 feet long of hard labour, hard work physically and mentally, great expectations, dreams fulfilled, amazing workmanship, creativity and anything else you would like to put here.....______________________________________ add it in.....
"The Haparanda" a yacht that is loved and will be here for generations to come...its story is of gigantioun proportions look it up on the net (thank god for this internet) and appreciate the wonder that it is....
I was pushed onto it I suffer from vetigo so steeping onto a yacht means I might as well be stepping of the side of Boulder Dam with out a parachute...but a nice young man pushed my arse firmly and with gusto so I popped onto the deck....what a sight this must have been - an old lady being shoved up onto a deck of a yacht.
At least I knew not to wear high heels and in another blog I must, yes I will actually give a list of yacht and boat protocols that so many don't know and wouldn't care about except the owner of the boat can do without any heel marks on the wooden decking and also black bottomed shoe marks etc. etc. etc. also it goes to following that you don't lean off or over etc. you just might fall off and drown...bad ending!!!!!!!!!to an outing. This might would flippent it isn't meant to be as so many people die by drowing and don't have the forsight nor the forthought nor the lifejacket that would have saved their and other people lives.
This boat is to dye for....I want it,,,,,,I want to spend time on her,,,,,I want to eat cake and drink John's special Aloe Vera (wonderful taste) specaial concoction he makes up I want to sail around the harbour and islands and I want to dove off into the warm waters for a swim...now don't you peeps laugh I can actually swim like a fish - when I was 100 pounds heavier I might have sunk like a stone but at the moment my weight is better and I have more energy so I should cope well..............see you in the summer in my one piece shiny purple halter neck ruffled swim suit. (picture that and have a hard drive break down...) lolololololol
I give a total 'shout out' to John and The Haparanda - all of you have to hire her out and enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm going on the hunt for cigs. While I type my blogs smoking isn't necessary in fact I abstain as I need both hands for typing and they are just a comfort in the ashtray and ofcourse become ash quickly...I wonder actually how many I smoke totally (probably not that many) I just increase the ash of the world markedly each day........take this and put it in your pipe and smoke it........cheers all
ciao
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Have a great Independence Day 2009
